Shopping, Numbers, and a two weeks worth of update

Random things going on in my life:
I bought new pj pants at Walmart last week. I knew I was going to need more warm pj's if I'm going to be at my parents' house for the winter (the house is really drafty). I was going to go to Old Navy, but thought I'd look in Walmart while I was there and found these:

Snoopy

Mickey

They are nice and fuzzy. :-)

I bought a throw blanket for my bed to decorate for Halloween and help cheer me up.

I feel like I really want to decorate, but the house isn't really set up to facilitate decorating. I did put a strand of jack-o-lantern garland up in my room by my closet. Definitely an improvement, but I still wish I could do more decorating.


I got to have a late lunch with my friend and her bf (whom I was meeting in person for the first time) on Monday. He brought me a reusable grocery bag. I'm totally obsessed with reusable bags. He thought my friend would like the slogan, and since we have similar tastes, he thought I'd like it too. :-)

It was really good to see her. I just wish I'd been feeling a bit more coherent. I was still recovering from working the skateboarding event on Saturday. Stupid CMV virus making things complicated as usual. (CMV post to come in the future.) Oh well... I'm just glad we got to catch up a little and hang out in person. :-)


Weight Updates and Thoughts:
Finally weighed in for an official weigh in at WW last Saturday morning. I was up a pound since my last weigh in at WW on 9/24. I thought I was going to have to pay for my two missed meetings in addition to this week, but they had a "re-join" option, so I paid $15 to do that.

At this week's weigh in I was down a pound. :-)  This puts me back to where I was a month ago, which is down 23.4 pounds, and I'm okay with that. I feel a bit more in focus with my life in general so that should help my eating. 

Something I've noticed reading different blogs is that everyone views and discusses their weight differently when referring to their weight loss. Some state their actual weight while others refer to how many pounds they've lost and how many more they have until they reach their goal. Of course there is the third category that does both.

Since starting this blog I fell in the second category of bloggers. I didn't like the idea of putting my actual weight numbers out in the world, mainly because I was embarrassed and ashamed that my weight had gotten that out of control. As I've made more and more progress and have felt less bad about the numbers (even if they are still much higher than I want them to be) I keep considering changing my approach. In a lot of ways I still think about my weight loss journey in terms of how many pounds I've lost and how many more I have until I reach my goal.

So here are my WW numbers...
Starting weight: 218.6
Current weight: 195.2
Goal weight: 138.6

Choosing a goal weight was difficult for me. According to the Weight Watchers charts, the maximum "healthy" weight for my height of 5'3" is 141, which would be a loss of 77.6 pounds, and since i like whole numbers I thought I'd round up to an even 80 pounds for my goal, just 2.4 more. There's a part of me that wants to set my goal weight lower, but it has been at least 7 years since I was in the 130s, and I have no way of knowing what my body will be like when I do get there again, especially with regular exercise being part of my routine by then (at least that's the plan). I refer to this as my goal weight, because it is the number I hope to set as my goal with Weight Watchers and getting to lifetime status with them. It seems like a weight that I should be able to stay under. Of course it will definitely be a wait and see sort of situation. I reserve the right to choose a lower number as my personal goal and maintenance weight. ;-)


This week's weigh in marks my 1 year anniversary of signing up for WW in Albany.

October Goals Update:
 - Tracking - I'm keeping up with continuing to write down everything I'm eating, but I haven't gotten back to making sure I'm consistently within my points for the day/week. This week I'm going to try and get back into the habit of tracking the points values of my food, and try to stay within my points.
 - Exercise - Still no real progress on this.Though, on Wednesday I helped my mom to prune back some plants in the garden to get them ready for winter. Not official exercise, but definitely more physical activity than normal for the day.
 - Sleep schedule - This is having some hit and miss progress. Though I'm slowly feeling as though there are becoming more hits than misses.

I'm still struggling with motivation in regards to the job search. There is a part of me feels as though the only shot I have at getting a job is to work in retail, and I honestly don't think I could handle having to do that again. It drains me physically and emotionally in a way I can't quite describe, which then just compounds my overall stress about financial matters... Stress and CMV do not mix well and so I end up in a cycle of either being stressed out and being physically ill, or avoiding stress like a plague and ending up being completely unproductive. So my ideal focus is to be productive in a way that minimizes my stress levels, thereby keeping myself from being sick so that I can continue to be productive.
I am starting to feel a bit of a mental shift so as to be in the right mindset for doing what I need to do. I'm hoping to be able to hang on to that mindset vs. losing it and feeling as though I'm grasping at straws trying to get things done.